🤱"Parenting Is NOT About Perfection!"

(5 minutes read) Struggling to Set Screen Time Limits with your kids?

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As a homeschooling mother of two, I've explored the world of online learning, communication, and creativity alongside my children. It's been a journey filled with both fascination and distracting fun. Recently, however, I've noticed a change in my son's online habits. What started as occasional distractions during his study time—checking emails, mindless browsing—soon became a regular occurrence. And his screen time for entertainment began stretching beyond the limits we'd set.

Our once peaceful talks, characterized by mutual respect and understanding, took a sharp turn. Frustration and resentment grew, leading to heated arguments and tense moments for both of us. 😫 Despite years of practicing positive parenting, I hit a wall. These past 10 days have been an emotional minefield, trying to navigate my son's screen habits. I found myself stuck and desperate! Why did I find it hard to bridge the gap between gentle parenting theory and practical reality?

Everywhere we look, screens call out – smartphones, tablets, TV, video games. They offer lots of opportunities for learning and connection, but they also bring many problems. From shorter attention spans to more anxiety and feeling alone, the negatives are becoming clear.

Peer pressure and what society expects just make things harder, pushing children to have smartphones and use certain apps and games. Our role as guides in this digital age is very important, but it's not easy. I've personally felt the frustration and helplessness that come with trying to find a balance. But before we continue this conversation, go support the sponsor we love today, here’s a quick ad for them.

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Our study area is an open space with our desks, so I can see what both my kids are doing on their screens. I don’t like the feeling of being suspicious or constantly monitoring, waiting to catch my son checking emails or gaming when he's supposed to be focused on learning. However, I would catch him daily being distracted. My frustration and anger grew daily without any control because he broke our agreement, again and again. Each time, he would kindly apologize and continue learning. Then he would ask for his entertainment session, and we would agree on a time.

However, he stretched his session for an extra 10 to 30 minutes, and it could have been longer if I hadn't intervened. This didn’t sit well with me either. These broken agreements were a daily occurrence for 10 days, happening 2 to 3 times a day. We couldn’t have proper communication because I was unable to stay present and calm. I was just angry every time, and it only got worse with each passing day.

Later, when I regained some calmness, I tried to find solutions, strategies, and ways to initiate a proper discussion. But in real-time, all those attempts failed. It's clear that we all need help and ways to deal with this new world of technology.

I couldn’t manage that dynamic with my son on my own. I asked for help from my husband. He took over some computer sessions for learning and entertainment, and I felt instant relief! “Oh, I don’t have to deal with that for now!” This made me realize how much I had on my plate – more than I realized. Therefore, the hypersensitivity and almost zero tolerance. And technology usage was a challenging topic for me.

I made a sustained effort to take better care of my emotional state to avoid reaching the red zone and unleashing the anger mode. I did this by knowing when I was about to explode and depend on my partner. Finding someone who could help take some of the load off my shoulders. While my husband took over, I used meditation, conscious breathing, energy work, walks outside, and simply took a break. My husband encouraged our son to take care of himself too. He’s been using meditation cards and engaging in activities like drawing and writing to be more present when he is not online.

*Please give a gentle round of applause too…*

This is Parenting

By: Leslie Hannans

This is Parenting: Demystifying parenthood is a fresh, new take on an old tradition, Parenting! For centuries, parents have engaged in a long tradition of parenting, based on how we learned. But, have we questioned our parenting techniques? Have we thought critically about what our actions can do to harm our children? This is exactly what This Is Parenting explores. We will dive into behavior modification, origins of modern parenting, skill acquisition, and more!

You won’t stop your kids from using devices. Technology is here, and the new generation is fully immersed in it. We shouldn’t fight it. But we can guide our children to have healthy relationships with screens, so they can become more tech-aware and maintain balance.

My husband, our children, and I collaborated to update our guidelines for healthy screen use. This process is ongoing, and we adapt as needed to guide them effectively. We aim to foster an environment that encourages maturity in the usage of technology. And while our journey navigating technology is far from over, each small victory is a testament to our intention and perseverance.

Parenting is not about perfection but about progress and empathy. It's about recognizing the challenges we face, embracing them as opportunities for growth and learning, and reaching out for help as needed. By fostering open communication, taking care of our emotional balance, setting clear boundaries, and modeling healthy tech habits, we can empower our children to navigate the digital world with confidence and resilience.

We can even help find other ways to enjoy and play without a screen too. I had an eye-opening experience a few days ago with my son. To be continued in another article. For now, if you want to nurture better quality and bonding time and help your kids play more naturally, download my free cheat sheet on quality time. Click the link down below :)


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